Sunday, March 18, 2007

French History of Warfare


France, not so good on the war thing. I have no idea if the following is a complete record of France's involvement in war. I could check but that is just putting way too much effort into this whole blog thing when I should be publishing.

France 4 - World 28
- American Revolution
- In a move that will become quite familiar to future Americans, France claims a win even though the English colonists saw far more action. This is later known as "de Gaulle Syndrome", and leads to the Second Rule of French Warfare; "France only wins when America does most of the fighting."

- French Revolution
- Won, primarily due the fact that the opponent was also French.

10 comments:

Robert L [Rivalries] said...

"Thousands of French women find out what it's like to not only sleep with a winner, but one who doesn't call her "Fraulein." Sadly, widespread use of condoms by American forces forestalls any improvement in the French bloodline."

HAHA!

At least they have the French Foreign Legion.

*initiates motion to move all hippies to France where they will be amongst their brethren*

Anonymous said...

"Going to war without the French is like going hunting without an accordion."

danylo said...

"I got a tip for you , if you install the french versions of your favorite programs, THEY RUN A LOT FASTER"

"Why wouldn't the Statue of Liberty work in France? Because she has only one arm raised."

Anonymous said...

Yeah, the information is flawed, France was victorious in some of those conflicts, such as the Thirty Years War, that is when France actually became the dominant state in Europe, and actually, the French have more history of beating the Germans than the Germans beating the French, and American involvement in WW1 hastened German defeat, they would have more than likely still lost the war.

Tamer said...

Man what's up with all you French Haters? Je pense que le monde entier sait que la France est impressionnante mais ils sont trop effrayƩs pour l'admettre.

Oh, and you must now return the Statue of Liberty too.

Robert L [Rivalries] said...

Haha, yea we are frightened of cigarette smoking hippies with berets.

France was not victorious in the thrity years war. France allied itself with one of the sides... it was eventually invaded by Spain and get their asses handed to them. Paris almost fell... the French constantly tried to get a trety going. After a while they sent the invaders back and a truce was made; thus a stalemate. Not a victory. Whats weird is that the thrity years war was mainly a religious war and France sided with the Protestants even though most French were Catholics.

Viva la France.

Anonymous said...

Vive* la France. If you want to insult the country, at least get its language right.

Also, only old men wear berets in France.

Anonymous said...

This is disgustingly biased... I'm not French, but am horrified... Even without a great history of warfare, they have remained a world power. France has contributed a lot to the world, and it is ridiculous to constantly ridicule them b/c they didn't join us on our losing war to Christianize the world.

Robert L [Rivalries] said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Robert L [Rivalries] said...

While we are on the topic of conflict.

I'm pretty sure France gave Israel nukes. That made people in the region very happy or so I hear.

Maybe the French executing ALgerian civilians made the world a better palce as well.

Or maybe French companies selling weapons to Saddam after the UN resolution was established.

Damn.

Who knows, I'm just an uneducated asshole.